Listen up. The Daddy just got off the phone with a friend who is dealing with an abusive husband. Besides talking with her about the abuse, The Daddy emailed her info about domestic violence. This article by Helpline.org was the first one. It covers the following concerns: - Understanding domestic violence and abuse
- Signs of an abusive relationship
- Violence is just one form of abuse
- Abusive behavior is a choice
- The cycle of violence
- Recognizing the warning signs
- Speak up if you suspect abuse
- Related links
Signs of an abusive relationship
Domestic violence and abuse can happen to anyone, yet the problem is often overlooked, excused, or denied. This is especially true when the abuse is psychological, rather than physical. Emotional abuse is often minimized, yet it can leave deep and lasting scars.
Noticing and acknowledging the warning signs and symptoms of domestic violence and abuse is the first step to ending it. No one should live in fear of the person they love. If you recognize yourself or someone you know in the following warning signs and descriptions of abuse, don’t hesitate to reach out. There is help available.
Understanding domestic violence and abuse
Domestic abuse, also known as spousal abuse, occurs when one person in an intimate relationship or marriage tries to dominate and control the other person. Domestic abuse that includes physical violence is called domestic violence.
Domestic violence and abuse are used for one purpose and one purpose only: to gain and maintain total control over you. An abuser doesn’t “play fair.” Abusers use fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under their thumb. Your abuser may also threaten you, hurt you, or hurt those around you.
Domestic violence and abuse do not discriminate. It happens among heterosexual couples and in same-sex partnerships. It occurs within all age ranges, ethnic backgrounds, and financial levels. And while women are more commonly victimized, men are also abused—especially verbally and emotionally.
Recognizing abuse is the first step to getting help
Domestic abuse often escalates from threats and verbal abuse to physical violence and even murder. And while physical injury may be the most obvious danger, the emotional and psychological consequences of domestic abuse are also severe. No one deserves this kind of pain—and your first step to breaking free is recognizing that your situation is abusive. Once you acknowledge the reality of the abusive situation, then you can get the help you need.
You don’t have to live in fear
If you are afraid for your safety or have been beaten by your partner:
- Dial 911 or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-787-3224.
- Read Help for Abused and Battered Women: Domestic Violence Shelters, Support, and Protection
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4 comments:
Great information MacDaddy!
I know first hand what it feels like to be abused. I found myself in more than one relationship where the gal I was living with suddenly turned on me. The cycle is hard to break because they seem to know just when youy are ready to pack it up and move out. Then they turn all nice and act very loving. Then bam, right when you're feeling confortable again there is another episode to throw the whole situation into craziness once again.
The first time this happened to me I was living with my daughter and her mother. Her mother used the leverage of me caring about my daughter and not wanting to leave because of that to really make my life a living hell.
I won't even go into how I finally got out of the relationship. Just say it was very ugly.
I refuse to put up with any of this type of nonsense from anybody today. I respect myself way too much to supject myself to this kind of abuse.
I feel sorry for those that get stuck in the cycle of abuse and can't get out, or don't think there is any way to get out of the situation.
Somebody: Your experience brings up something not people realize: men get abused in spousal issues too. As a Violence Prevention Coordinator, and later as the President of my own business, I worked with many men who had been or were being abused.
Some were regular labors doing temp work. Several were athletes, football and basketball players.
I know the record says most abuse is done by men. But I also feel some types of abuse is counted as more prevalent than others. The physical abuse by men is counted more and should be. No man should be hitting on a woman. But what I noticed in the abuse relationships with women was that women had greater verbal facility and could talk rings men. When not curing them out and calling them names, they could simply talk the loudest, saying terrible things about the man.
Men who counsel men need to keep this in mind and provide greater verbal skills-- not to compete with their partner but to help cool things down so they can really have a rational conversation.
Otherwise, it's like just another Jerry Spring episode.
You have provided an excellent resource on domestic violence and presented it in a very succinct fashion. Thank you. As a domestic violence survivor and psychologist advocate, I find that when people recognize the underlying dynamics and characteristics defining partner abuse, they heal and avoid involvement in subsequent abusive relationships. For additional resources on domestic violence dynamics and healing, visit us at http://www.preventabusiverelationships.com/ebooks.php Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D.
Dr. King: Thanks for visiting daddyBstrong. I'm sorry to say I tried to check out your blog but it didn't come up. But I'll keep trying.
Blessings.
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